This bittersweet tragedy
by GoldSilver02
Summary: AU. After a horrific accident, Clove McAllister is sent to live with her cousin Gale in the small town of Panem. Life, love, trust and tragedy come full force as a group of friends are confronted with falling apart or coming together. Clato, Gale/Katniss/Peeta, Marvel/Glimmer, Finnick/Annie
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing. If I did, student loans would not be an issue and I would be able to travel the world. Alas, student loans is an issue and the world has yet been mine for the taking. _

_**Pairing**__: Cato/Clove, Gale/Katniss/Peeta, Marvel/Glimmer, Finnick/Annie, others mentioned and alluded to. _

_**Summary:**__ AU. After a horrific accident, Clove McAllister is sent to live with her cousin Gale in the small town of Panem. Life, love, trust and tragedy come full force as a group of friends are confronted with falling apart of coming together._

_**Author's note**__: AU. So, no Hunger Games. Panem is a fictional town outside of Connecticut (which obviously doesn't exist, but humor me, please). Also, I just really like the idea of Clove and Gale being cousins, so this where this came from. Cato doesn't make an appearance in this chapter but he will in the next one. I promise. Clove may seem out of character but no worries, you'll see the real Clove a little later on and in flashbacks. Hopefully you all enjoy! Reviews are great appreciated but please no flaming. Thanks again and enjoy!_

* * *

_This bittersweet tragedy_

_Chapter 1_

* * *

It's hard for her to breathe. Her body is radiating with pain she didn't even know existed. Her eyelids are heavy, hard to open and when she finally manages, she wishes she kept them closed. Her vision is blurry and all she can see are startling blue and red flashing lights. Everything feels wrong to her. It may be the smell of metal and fuel that overwhelms her senses, it may be the distant voices she hears, all she knows is that there is a tight ball in the pit of her stomach that is telling her _something is wrong._

She gets her answer in the faces of her dead parents.

She feels her heart explode, feels the panic grip at her when suddenly it all comes back to her. Car. Red light. Truck. The gnashing sound of metal, the screams that pierced the air.

It was raining. She was at her soccer game when it started to downpour but they played on. Thirty more minutes of grueling running, slipping and sliding and they won the game. One step closer to the championship. She was soaked to the bone. She remembers her mother fussing and her father grumbling good-naturedly about his wet socks.

And then everything changed. _One split second_ and her entire life is torn apart by blood, broken bones and twisted metal.

"Miss." She hears. The voice is distorted and she blinks wildly at the flashlight that is directed at her eyes. "Everything will be alright. We're going to pull you out nice and slowly now."

She wants to ask about her parents. Wants to ask why she's _so_ tired all of a sudden. Wants to beg. Wants to cry. But she can't. So, instead, she just closes her eyes and welcomes the darkness.

In the distance, she can still hear the rain. The steady beat of it reminds her of heartbeats.

(And then the heartbeats stop).

* * *

_One month later_

"Clove?" His deep voice resonates through the now empty house.

She winces at the echo; she was never accustomed to this house being empty. It was never empty before. She was born and raised in this house. She laughed, loved, cried, lived and now died in this house. "Up here." She calls out, her voice wavering just slightly.

She's standing in the middle of her now empty bedroom. She doesn't look at him when he leans against the doorframe. She continues to stare at her bare walls that used to be filled with posters and pictures. She used to have a bookcase and she used to have her cleats on the left side of her bureau. She used to have a desk that was her own organized mess ("how you can find anything in this mess, I'll never know" her father used to tell her, "you're just jealous," she would reply, "well, of course I am!")

But now it's empty. Just like the rest of the house. Everything has been stripped down and taken away. Locked up in storage or sold.

"Truck's all loaded up and ready." He tells her softly. "Cecelia is outside."

Clove nods and finally turns her head to look at him. He's large, but then again, Gale Hawthrone always seemed larger than life to her. His brown eyes are tired and sad and Clove has to remind herself that she's not the only person mourning. Her parents were Gale's aunt and uncle and they were close. Gale always coming down and spending the summer with them.

"It seems wrong, doesn't it?" He asks, his voice steady but Clove can detect the faintest of wavers. "The house being so empty. So…hollow."

"Everything is wrong." Clove responds.

Gale nods. "You ready?"

_That's a loaded question_, Clove thinks miserably, _I don't think I'll ever be ready_. She nods and grabs her bag that's next to the door. She walks down the steps next to Gale and holds on to him for support. Even though the doctors have cleared her, her body still protests, still _hurts_. She's not quite what she used to be and doesn't think she'll ever get back to how she was.

She steps out of the front door and is greeted by an older woman. The woman smiles sadly at her and opens her arms. Clove bites her lip and leans forward. "Oh sweetheart." Cecelia murmurs.

Cecelia watched her grow up. She watched her cry, laugh, love and watched her mourn. Cecelia was the grandmother Clove never had and it was requested that anything real estate related was to be dealt by Cecelia. Clove had no problem letting her do everything. "I'll miss you CeeCee." Clove whispers.

"I'll miss you too. But we're not far, you hear me? You come back and you visit this old bat."

Clove manages a smile. "As often as I can."

Cecelia looks over her shoulder to Gale. "You take good care of this one, you got that? Or you're going to have me to deal with."

Gale nods quickly and fights back laughter. He kisses Cecelia on the cheek. "I'll personally take care of her every whim."

"Be safe."

Clove takes a deep breath and places the house key in Cecelia's hand. "As safe as I can be." She gives her one last hug before she gets in the passenger seat of the truck. With the seatbelt secured across her chest, Clove turns her head to look at Gale as he takes in a deep breath and starts the car. He honks to Cecelia as he pulls out of the driveway and Clove waves and stares at Cecelia, her old house, her old life.

She keeps staring until it disappears from the rearview window.

* * *

Clove McAllister grew up in Manhattan. She lived, laughed, cried, loved and watched her parents die in Manhattan. Which is why staring at the _Welcome to Connecticut_ signs looks strange to her. It's not that she hasn't been here before. She has. Gale comes up for the summer, she goes down for Christmas. But she was only ever there for a week, _two_, at the most.

Now, she's going to live here. Live in a different state and in a small town.

Panem is a small town just outside of Connecticut and it always amused Clove how everyone knew everything about everyone. Now, she's dreading it. Dreading what they know. What they don't know. She's a bundle of nerves and it's so_ unlike_ her. She's used to being in charge. Used to being strong. Used to not giving a shit.

"We should be there in another couple hours." Gale says. "You want anything to eat? Anything to drink? Wanna go shop or something before we get there?"

"Gale, I'm fine." He's been like this for the past month. Always protective. Always making sure she eats and drinks water and doesn't get too lost in her depression. He took her to her appointments, helped settle whatever there was to settle with the lawyers. He helped her pack, held her while she cried and stayed up at all hours of the night going through old photo albums. "Thank you, for everything."

He glances at her and smiles, "Clove, you don't _ever_ have to thank me for anything. Besides, this was…it was good I got out while I did."

"Why?" She asked quickly, "what happened? Are your brothers and sister okay? Your mom?"

He shook his head, "nah, they're all good. Great even. Mom and Pose can't wait till you're actually there. Vick and Rory are pretty psyched too."

He doesn't say anything else and then it suddenly clicks in Clove's mind. There is only _one_ other person that affects Gale as much as she does. "Katniss." She doesn't miss the way her cousin flinches at the sound of his best friends name. "What happened?"

"Peeta Mellark happened."

"The baker's son?"

Gale nodded. "They started dating a month before…well, before."

"Oh, Gale. Why didn't you tell me?"

"You were a bit busy with tests and soccer and tennis and ballet and _seriously,_ how _many_ extra-curricular activities were you involved in? And then…well, then…_yeah_. So, I came up and basicallyblewoffeverysingleo neofhertexts."

"What?"

"I've been ignoring her." He says, his voice low and full of regret. "I just…I couldn't help it. Every time I would see her name pop up, I would get this anger and hurt and I didn't even read them and then I kind of stopped answering_ everyone_ because it was just easier that way."

"It's kind of shitty that she would get with Peeta even after you told her you've been in love with her since forever."

He snorts and rubs at his neck. His neck is starting to flush and his fingers drum against the steering wheel. Clove stares at him and then groans. "You didn't tell her. She doesn't know that you love her? _You_ told _me_ you told her!"

"I tried telling her." He defends, "I just…couldn't."

"And then Peeta got there."

Gale nods, "And I can't even hate him because he's a nice guy. He's good for her."

"Not as good as you though."

"No. Not as good as me." They're silent for a few moments when he clears his throat. "It's just…back at house, remember how you said _everything is wrong_? That is exactly what this feels like. It's just…_wrong_. Like the world tilted on its axis and fucked everything up."

"This is life, Gale." Clove says quietly, "life fucks you up and then you die."

It's morbid but the hollowness she feels tells her that she's right.

* * *

Her aunt Hazelle is out the door as soon as they pull into the driveway. Clove blinks rapidly to stop the tears as aunt Hazelle hugs her as soon as Clove steps out of the truck and murmurs sweet nothings into her ear.

"Mom." Gale says, "give her some room to breathe."

"Of course." Hazelle wipes at her eyes and smiles wobbly at Clove. "You look exactly like your mother." Even though her father was Hazelle's brother, Clove knows that both her mom and aunt were best friends ("sisters" her mother once said, "we became sisters by marriage and decided that blood never really meant anything to begin with.")

"Clove!" Posy shrieks as she comes running out in her pink overalls. The little girl starts talking a mile a minute and Clove can only nod back. She sees Vick and Rory come out of the house, their hands shoved deep into their pockets.

"You two wanna help me with some of this stuff?" Gale asks.

They nod and start unloading the truck.

Posy tugs at her hand and Clove looks down at her. "Yous sharing wit' me."

Hazelle clears her throat and blushes. "We just…we don't have any more rooms. I hope that's okay."

"It's perfect." Clove responds. "Thank you for doing this. I'll…I'll repay you for everything."

"_God,_ Clove, that's not what I meant!" Hazelle says frantically. "You're my niece. I would and will do anything for you."

"I know." Clove reassures her.

"Mom." Vick says, her voice straining under the baggage. "The neighbors are staring."

"Nosey bastards." Rory mutters.

"Rory! Language!" Hazelle reprimands.

"It is true though." Gale agrees.

Hazelle nods hesitantly. "Let's get you inside and settled in. Leave the boys to bring this in."

"I can help." Clove says as she grabs a couple of bags only to have them taken out of her hands by Rory.

"Nah, we've got this. You three just go inside and make yourselves to be princesses while the men do all the work."

"You're such a drama queen." Gale teases.

"Which is why he doesn't have a girlfriend." Vick snickers.

Hazelle shakes her head, picks Posy up and gestures for Clove to go inside. "Boys, what can you do with them?"

* * *

Clove can't sleep. Even though she's mentally, emotionally and physically exhausted, she can't sleep. She tosses and turns as quietly as she can as to not wake up Posy but the little girl sleeps peacefully.

As grateful as she is for her aunt to take her in, Clove can't help but feel out of place. She doesn't have the memories that Gale, Rory, Vick and Posy do in this house. She doesn't know this town like the back of her hand. She doesn't have friends in this town. The only friends she has are in this house. She's only ever been a visitor here and now she's meant to stay. Meant to create an entirely new life.

Tears pricking her eyes, Clove lets out a huff and gets out of bed. She makes her way around the house quietly and creeps down the stairs. She straightens up as soon as she sees the television glowing from the family room. She walks in and spies Gale on the couch. He lifts his head at the noise and stares at her. "Couldn't sleep?"

She shakes her head. "Nope. You?"

He shakes his head and sits up so that she can have the other half of the couch. He holds up his phone. "Catnip messaged again."

"What'd she say?"

He sighs, "_'I thought we were friends._'"

"You are."

"Are we? God, Clove…I feel like I haven't been _friends_ with her for the past couple of years. Just this growing ball of something _other than friendship_. She's consumed me."

"What are you going to do about it?"

Gale shrugs. "Nothing. Practice for football starts up again. Gonna throw myself into that. Get good grades. Hopefully nab a decent scholarship to a college out of this state and get the fuck out as quickly as humanly possible."

"With as little to no interaction with Katniss and Peeta." Clove finishes for him. She nods in understanding, her plan similar to his. "Isn't that going to be hard though? Aren't the rest of your friends, well…don't you have the same group of friends?"

He groans. "Don't remind me. Finn and Cato have left me messages full heartedly believing I'm dead and Jo is threatening to kill me if I'm actually still alive. Marvel is convinced I've gone off the deep-end and just buried myself in alcohol."

"They don't know?"

Gale frowns and then shakes his head wildly. "No. _No_. No one knows. Mom, Rory, Vick…we're the only ones that know and Posy just thinks you're here because you miss us. It wasn't…it's not our place to tell. Besides," he says bumping his shoulder with hers, "I know how much you hate pity and well…this town, it's _no one's business_."

The relief she feels is unlike anything she's ever felt before.

"Gale?" Clove calls out after a period of silence.

"Mhmm?"

"I'm…I think…I'm scared. I don't…I just…"

He sighs and pulls her closer to his head. "I know. Trust me, I know. You'll pull through, Clove. We'll help you get through this."

She sniffs and wipes at her face. "Gale?"

"Yeah?"

"Why are we watching _SpongeBob SquarePants_?"

* * *

_So….what do you all think? This is my first venture into The Hunger Games so I'm really nervous about it. Also, I'm just in the middle of starting it but I really really really love Clove and Cato and Gale so I kind of needed to do this. _

_Reviews are greatly appreciated! Let me know what you guys think so far, but please, no flaming. That being said, constructive criticism is the food of Gods. I know that Clove is out of characters but don't worry, the stubborn Clove will be back and you'll even see her in flashbacks! _

_So, hopefully you all enjoyed!_

_Thanks, _

_**Bex**_

_**P.S.**__ Any mistakes are mine and I apologize if they offend anyone! _


	2. Chapter 2

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing. If I did, student loans would not be an issue and I would be able to travel the world. Alas, student loans is an issue and the world has yet been mine for the taking. _

_**Pairing**__: Cato/Clove, Gale/Katniss/Peeta, Marvel/Glimmer, Finnick/Annie, others mentioned and alluded to. _

_**Summary:**__ AU. After a horrific accident, Clove McAllister is sent to live with her cousin Gale in the small town of Panem. Life, love, trust and tragedy come full force as a group of friends are confronted with falling apart of coming together._

_**Author's note**__: AU. So, no Hunger Games. Panem is a fictional town outside of Connecticut (which obviously doesn't exist, but humor me, please). Also, I just really like the idea of Clove and Gale being cousins, so this where this came from. Cato makes a small appearance but will make a bigger one in the next chapter, as will other characters. Hopefully you all enjoy! Reviews are great appreciated but please no flaming. Thanks again and enjoy!_

* * *

_This bittersweet tragedy_

_Chapter 2_

* * *

When Clove wakes up the next morning, she's in her own bed with the sun staring brightly through the window. She doesn't remember going back up to her bed. All she remembers is falling asleep to the nasally voice of Squidward. She breathes in deeply and turns to the side only to jolt back. Two brown eyes stare back at her expectantly.

Posy lets out a smile. "Morning! What are we going to do today?"

Clove blinks and stares at the six year old. "Someone's a morning person." She grumbles. Then she smiles softly at her youngest cousin. "What do you usually do?"

Posy frowns. "Rory and Vick take care of me, sometimes Gale too but he's busy with football. But they're _boring_. I wanna be with you."

"We'll figure out something to do a little later. After we've gotten cleaned up and eaten breakfast."

Posy nods. "Beat you downstairs?"

Before Clove can reply, Posy runs out the door and thuds down the stairs at an alarming rate.

"POSY!" She can hear Rory from across the hall. "NOT SO LOUD!"

Clove chuckles before stretching languidly in her bed and wonders if Rory knows he's being contradictory._ Probably not._ Slipping on a pair of flip-flops, Clove walks out the room and down the stairs where Posy is waiting patiently at the kitchen table.

"I beat you." Posy announces, a large smile on her face. "Can you make me something to eat?"

Clove nods. "Yeah. I can do that. Eggs or pancakes?"

"Pancakes!"

"Go ask your brothers if they want some."

Posy runs up the stairs just as loudly and Clove laughs when she hears Posy yell whether or not anyone else wants pancakes.

"You're going to spoil her." Her aunt Hazelle says as she walks into the kitchen with her travel mug. She winces at the loud voices.

"Are they always like this?" Clove asks as she grabs the ingredients from the fridge and cabinets. Then she pauses and looks at the older woman, "is this okay? For me to make breakfast and look through your cupboards-"

"I'm going to stop you right there." Hazelle says. "Clove, sweetie, how many times do I have to tell you? This is_ your_ house now. You can do whatever you want to do."

Clove nods and takes in a deep breath. "I just…sometimes, I don't know what to do. It's like I can't even _breathe_."

Hazelle nods and leans against the counter as she waits for the coffee to brew. "To be honest…it doesn't get any easier. At least not anytime soon. When I lost Tom…I felt like the ground opened up, sucked me in and then chewed me back out. I didn't know up from down, right from left. I was a _mess_. Four kids to support and I was on my own. Your parents, God bless their souls, helped me as much as they could. But I kept on thinking, _when is this pain going to go away_? _When is time going to heal my wounds_?"

Clove nods. "Aunt Hazelle, it's almost as if I've forgotten how to live. It scares the hell out of me."

"I won't lie to you, the first year is the hardest. The pain is so raw and everything you see and do and say somehow reminds you of what you lost but then…it's like…numbness sets in. You learn how to function without your other half. It's a cycle. Some days are good, some days are bad."

"They want some!" Posy exclaims as she comes barreling into the kitchen. "Can I help?"

"You can sit at the table." Hazelle says, tapping the little girl on her nose. She turns around and fills the mug with coffee and screws the lid on tight. She turns to Clove, sighs and kisses her atop her head. "I love you."

"Love you too aunt Hazelle." Clove says, her voice thick.

"I'll be at the Inn until supper. Posy, be good for your cousin. Clove, if they get to be too much, take them to the park. Posy'll tire herself right out. If you need anything, my numbers are on the fridge. _Call me_. Come visit me even. I love you both." She moves to stand at the bottom of the stairs. "I love you boys!"

Muffled "_love you too's_" can be heard and Hazelle smiles. "See you girls later."

* * *

So, maybe she won't get over what happened. It's not like she expected to be fine after what happened. She doesn't expect to be normal or to feel and act how she did before. She's different. Her _life_ is _different_. And a part of her always knew what her aunt Hazelle had told her; time healing all wounds was a crock full of shit. As of right now, her wounds are still fresh, still raw, still poignant and she doesn't _know_ if they'll go away. She doesn't know if she _wants_ them to go away.

Most of all though, she's terrified that one day, she'll wake up and forget what her parents looked like. She'll forget her mothers green eyes. Her father's glasses. She'll forget the way her mother's voice sounds and the way her father always seemed to smell like sandalwood. She's terrified that she'll forget the little things. She's terrified for the day when numbness settles in and suddenly, living without her parents becomes normal. She doesn't want that. Doesn't know what to do when it comes to that.

She lets out a sigh as she rinses the last plate and dries her hands on a piece of cloth. She looks up as Gale comes into the kitchen, wiping the sleep from his eyes. His eyes fall to the plate of pancakes set aside. "For me?"

Clove nods and fetches the maple syrup. "Want some whipped cream?"

"Do you even need to ask?" He shakes his head and he settles onto a chair. "Fuck, if Coach saw me eating this, he'd probably freak."

"Oh yeah, you have practice today right?"

"Tryouts. But I already have my spot so I'm there as moral support for the guys trying out."

"And to torture them."

"Well, yeah." He takes a few more bites. "What have you got planned?"

Clove shrugs. "I'll probably be dragged along to wherever Posy takes me."

Gale snorts. "Stay away from the shops. She'll drag you in under one pretense and you'll come out short a couple hundred. She does that _damn face_. Gets _everyone every single time."_

"She'll be a little heartbreaker."

Gale shakes his head. "Yeah right, I've been telling mom to send her to a convent as soon as she turns thirteen. You guys should come by. Posy knows where the school is. I can introduce you to everyone. You can meet some people. Have Rory give you the low-down on everyone, because for some reason that kid knows more about people than _anyone_ does."

"Yeah, I'll bring it up, see what they want to do."

He brings his plate to the sink and washes it.

"Did you carry me to my room last night?" Clove asks.

"Yeah, I did. By the way, how much do you weigh? Because for such a small girl, you weigh a lot."

Clove punches him in the shoulder. "You're an asshole!"

* * *

By noon, the kids are hungry and they can't decide on what they want until Clove mentions that they should just out to eat. The three of them trade looks, "Greasy Sae." They say in unison. Clove, for the life of her, doesn't know why anyone would want to eat somewhere that has the word _greasy_ in it, but she nods, trades her pajamas for a pair of loose jeans, a t-shirt and keeps her flip-flops. She helps Posy into bright yellow shorts and a black t-shirt. "I look like a bumblebee!" She says gleefully. She pokes Clove in the arm while making "_bzz bzz_" sounds.

Rory and Vick are waiting for them downstairs and she lets Rory lock up the house. She doesn't know the town very well (if at all), so she has no problem in letting the kids lead the way.

_Greasy Sae_ isn't as greasy as she thought it would be. The three of them take a seat next to the window. They're in their seats for no more than two minutes when a petite blonde hair girl with a notepad comes to their table. "Hi Rory." She says softly.

He clears his throat, "Hi Prim. How are you?"

"Good and you?"

"Good. How's summer vacation going?"

"Good and yours?"

"Good."

"That's good."

Clove whips her head back and forth, amused at the interaction. Vick rolls his eyes and Posy launches forward. "Hi Prim!"

"Hi Posy, how are you?"

"Oh not this again." Vick mumbles.

The table jolts and all is silent until Posy lets out a wail. Her eyes fill with tears and her lower lip trembles. "Why'd you kick me?" She sobs out.

"_Shit_ Pose! I'm sorry! I meant to kick Vick not you."

Clove turns her head to the blonde whose eyes are wide. "Do you have ice?"

"Posy, sweetie, are you okay?" Prim asks.

_What, am I invisible_? Clove puts her hand forward to block the girl from reaching for Posy and she pins her with a frosty glare. "_Prim_, is it? Do you have ice? Because my six-year-old cousin just got kicked in the leg and I would like to ice it before it leaves a bruise."

"What's going on here?" An older woman walks out.

Clove vaguely hears the front door open and doesn't even bother looking at the customers who are openly gaping and surrounding the table. She's starting to get agitated because she doesn't know these people, Posy is still crying, and she _still_ hasn't even gotten ice yet. If she were back in Manhattan, Clove would have raised hell by now. She's tempted to start because apparently, the only way to get attention is by causing a spectacle.

"I don't know." Prim bubbles, nervously, "We were just talking and then Posy got kicked-"

"By who?"

"Does it matter?" Someone cut in.

"Hey!" Clove speaks up. She's ignored, which doesn't surprise her but bothers her a lot. So, she puts two fingers in her mouth and lets out a piercing whistle that quiets even Posy. "I need _ice_. In fact, the first thing, _she_" Clove says pointing at Prim, "should have done was get me the ice when I first asked, so if someone and at this point I _don't care who_, could get me some ice, that would be fantastic." Nobody moves. "_Now_."

Prim scurries off to the back and Clove outstretches her hand for Posy to take. "Come on Pose, I'll take you to the bathroom, so I can look at it."

"Is there a reason why you just yelled at my sister?" A female voice cuts in.

Clove sighs and turns her head. Her eyes stop at the front door, a tall girl with a brown leather jacket and braids is standing in front of it. She knows her instantly from the pictures that Gale has showed her. _Katniss_. _Of course. Because the world, obviously fucking hates me right now_. "I don't have time for this." Clove answers honestly.

"I'm sure you can make time." Katniss grabs her arm and in an instinct Clove has Katniss' wrist in a tight grip. Katniss winces.

"Get. Your. Hand. Off. Of. Me." Clove grinds out. "I freaked out on your sister? I don't particularly care because my primary concern is my cousin. So, just back off, okay? Because I'm not in the mood to deal with this self-righteous bullshit."

"Hi Katniss." Posy sniffles.

"Here's ice." Prim says, "And I've brought the first aid kit just in case you need it."

"Thanks." Clove responds. "You two," she says, pointing Rory and Vick who have been oddly silent since the incident. "Order the food to go please."

"We'll take four regulars Prim, please and thanks." She hears Rory mumble.

Clove tries her best to steady her breathing because she's sure if she doesn't, her blood pressure is going to send her into an early grave. She mentally laughs at the irony.

* * *

She has Posy on her back as they make their way to the school. "We can eat there." Vick says.

"I really am sorry, Posy. I didn't mean to hurt you."

"I know. Its okay." Posy says. "Love you."

"Love you more."

"You know," Vick says, as he walks next to Clove, "I wonder what Gale is going to say when he finds out you snapped at Katniss _and_ Prim. Prim is like…untouchable. The entire town, and especially her sister, believes she's this sort of fragile butterfly or something equally as mortifying."

Clove shrugs. "I was getting agitated and Posy was crying and everyone was just _standing_ there. I mean _seriously_?"

"Oh, I'm on your side." Vick says with a grin. "I don't like Katniss very much." He admits quietly. "I mean she's nice and everything but Gale…he_ loves_ her. And she doesn't and that's not okay with me."

"Has anyone ever told you that you're very loyal?" Clove asks.

Vick shakes his head. "Is that a good thing?"

"Very good." Clove reassures him. "I'm the same way."

"I'm hungry." Rory grumbles.

"Well, you wouldn't be if you knew where you were kicking." Vick retorts.

"Shut-up."

"I think I see Gale!" Posy shrieks.

A few more steps and Clove sets Posy down on the front row bleacher and Rory and Vick follow suit. Take-out containers are passed around. "Melted chocolate milkshakes for the four of us." Rory says as he hands them out. "Finally lets eat."

"You're here to torture me, aren't you?" Gale asks, as he takes the seat next to Posy and steals one of her fries.

"Well…"

"Rory kicked me but its okay now and then Clove yelled at Prim and Katniss and then everyone was staring but I'm okay now and then Clove got her ice and we eat our food here and Clove let me piggy back all the way here and _I'm okay now_."

"You yelled at Prim and Katniss?" Gale asks.

"That's what you got out of that?" Clove asks exasperatedly. "They wouldn't give me the ice and Posy was wailing and I kind of snapped but not even that much!"

"Why did Rory kick you?"

"It was meant for me." Vick speaks up.

"It was accident! And Vick was being rude."

"I was not."

"It's okay! _I'm okay_!" Posy yells.

"Wish you were back to be an only child yet?" Gale wonders with humor. His face drops a few seconds after he says it. "Fuck, Clove, I didn't mean it that way."

"It's fine." Clove says gritting her teeth. "It's fine." She used to beg her parents for a kid brother or sister. She always wanted someone to talk to and laugh with and cry with. She wanted to have the sibling bond that she knows her cousins have. And even after all the Christmas and birthday wishes, she never got the sibling she always wanted. Which, in retrospect is probably better because she can barely keep herself together, so how on earth would she help a figurative sibling from breaking down too?

"Hey Hawthorne!" A tall boy with black hair comes jogging up to them with two other guys flanking each side. He eyes the burgers, "seriously? Your siblings purposely trying to torture us?" His eyes land on Clove. "Who are you?"

"Guys, come on, Coach will have our ass-holy shit, is that from _Greasy Sae_?"

"Bunch of pansies, all of you." The blonde one says, he frowns as he looks at Clove. "Who are you?"

"That's what _I _asked!" The first one says.

"Are you going to eat that?" The second one asks as he looks at her untouched food. "Because I can inhale that for you, in like five seconds. Seriously. _Time me_."

"She's my cousin Clove." Gale introduces her.

The second one frowns. "Are you the one who slapped Katniss?"

Clove chokes on air. "_What_?"

The first one shakes his head. "No, I heard you threatened Jo."

"_Who_?" She looks to Gale for help.

"Jesus Christ." Gale mutters.

"I thought you lived in Manhattan." The blonde one says. "That's what Gale said."

"She didn't slap Katniss. She hasn't even met Johanna yet and yes, she lived in Manhattan. She's also a Taurus and her favorite sport is soccer. Would you like to know her blood type too?" Gale asks angrily.

"Whoa, calm down, man. Just wanted to clear the air."

"Clove," Gale sighs, "Meet Finnick," the first one, "Marvel," the second one, who oddly, would _not_ take his eyes off her meal, "and Cato" the third one, who for some reason would _not_ take his eyes off _her_.

"Are you girls here to chat or play?" A thunderous male voice boomed across the field. "Get your asses back here!"

As soon as they leave, Gale with a sigh and kiss on Posy and Clove's foreheads, Finnick with a wink, Marvel with a longing glance at her food and Cato at her, Clove shakes her head. "What the fuck?" She wonders aloud. She puts a hand over her mouth as Posy giggles.

"Welcome to small town life." Rory says.

"By the time mom comes home, she'll have heard that you've murdered someone."

"What an introduction into society, yeah?"

"Well, think of it this way, at least you don't have to fight to the death." Vick says while chewing his burger.

"It's high school. It's exactly like fighting to the death."

"I'm tired." Posy complains.

* * *

By the time they get home, Posy is sleeping, Rory collapses onto the couch, the remote in his hand before he even hits the cushions and Vick runs up to his room. Clove makes her way up the stairs and puts Posy in her bed, a thin blanket covering her. She opens the window all the way to let the warm breeze into the room.

Her mother would have probably clucked her tongue and shook her head if she heard what Clove did. Her father would have laughed, pride seeping through his eyes before he cleared his throat and shook his head as soon as her mother would glare at him. Behind her back. he'd give her a thumbs up.

Clove took after her father in her personality. Nice to those who proved themselves and indifferent to everyone else. A proponent of self-worth, her father always pushed her to do and try anything that would even remotely make his only child happy. She would watch soccer games with her dad, yell at the television with her dad, eat an entire pizza with her dad.

Her mother was her number one fan in everything. Always on the sidelines with a bright smile and yells of encouragement. Her mother was the polar opposite to Clove and her father. Always nice to everyone, even those who didn't deserve it. She would participate in all school functions. Where her father pushed her physically, her mother pushed her intellectually, making sure that her grades never faltered and always offered support where she needed it. So, Clove swooned over men with her mother, went shopping with her mother, laughed at romantic comedies with her mother.

She was able to have the best of both worlds with her parents, now, she can't have any.

There is a soft knock and Clove looks up from her place on her bed to see Gale. He's sweaty and tired-looking. "Hey, when did you get back?" She asks.

"A couple minutes ago. You do know it's almost five right?"

"Um…no. No, I didn't. I must have lost track of time. What's up?"

"Mom called on my way in the door, she was wondering if we could start dinner. You up for it?"

Clove nods eagerly and then glances at Posy's bed, only to find it empty. Her heart rises in her throat as she tumbles out of bed. "Posy-"

"Downstairs with Rory. It's okay, she knows better than to leave the house on her own. Clove…you okay? I can do dinner." He's looking at her worriedly.

Clove shakes her head. "No, I got it. I'll help."

"I'm going to take a quick shower and we're doing chicken stir-fry. Everything should be in the fridge."

Clove nods and makes her way back downstairs. Posy sees her and waves. "You were sleeping. I left you sleeping."

"I was?" Clove doesn't remember sleeping. She doesn't even remember closing her eyes, she just remembers lying on her bed and thinking about her parents. _I'm losing my mind. I'm losing my fucking mind…what else is new?_

* * *

By the time her aunt Hazelle walks through the door, the food is done. Rory is setting the table and Posy runs to her mother's side.

"Something smells delicious." Hazelle comments.

"Tastes good too." Gale agrees.

"Because he wouldn't stop sticking his fingers in the food." Clove tells her.

Hazelle chuckles and helps bring the food to the table. As soon as they're seated, Hazelle takes a look around and smirks, "so, does anyone want to tell me why I heard that the _new girl_ is a grave digging drunk?"

"Oh. My. God." Clove groans, as she puts her head in her hands.

Gale laughs loudly, Rory goes beat red, Posy giggles, not understanding anything.

"Hmph," Vick says, "well, that's a new one."

* * *

_So, the introduction of Cato-ish. I know that this story seems to be slow moving and it probably will be, I'm trying to cement the relationship/friendship that Gale and Clove have which will be integral to the story a little later on, so please bear with me! Also, I want to make the introduction of everyone else, seem real, so hopefully that'll come across as well. This is definitely going to be longer than my other fics, so I want to get this right and I want to honor the Hunger Games, which is an amazing trilogy. There will be more interaction between the characters in the next chapter, which should be interesting (hopefully). _

_I hope that you guys liked this chapter. It's more of a filler than anything else but I'm hoping that it's okay. __**ALSO:**__ I mean no disrespect to small towns when I talk about Panem. I'm running from personal experience so, this is not meant to be an insult towards small towns or anything like that. _

_**ONTO MY WICKED REVIEWERS**__: __**Guest, AbbyMellark21, clovelycato555, Clato 27, GottaLoveClove, joshifer-emerquaid-alexbelle **__and __**kizza**__. You guys are awesome, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Much love for your support on this. Also__**, huge shoot-out**__ to everyone who has read/alerted/favorited/etc…you guys are awesome and I love you all!_

_Much love, _

_**Bex**_

_**P.S**__. Any mistakes are mine and mine alone. I apologize if they offend anyone. _


	3. Chapter 3

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing. If I did, student loans would not be an issue and I would be able to travel the world. Alas, student loans is an issue and the world has yet been mine for the taking. _

_**Pairing**__: Cato/Clove, Gale/Katniss/Peeta, Marvel/Glimmer, Finnick/Annie, others mentioned and alluded to. _

_**Summary:**__ AU. After a horrific accident, Clove McAllister is sent to live with her cousin Gale in the small town of Panem. Life, love, trust and tragedy come full force as a group of friends are confronted with falling apart of coming together._

_**Author's note**__: AU. So, no Hunger Games. Panem is a fictional town outside of Connecticut (which obviously doesn't exist, but humor me, please). Also, I just really like the idea of Clove and Gale being cousins, so this where this came from. Summer is ending and school will be starting again. Cato makes a slightly (not by much) appearance but next chapter is when he'll definitely start appearing more regularly. Hope everyone enjoys!_

* * *

_This bittersweet tragedy_

_Chapter 3_

* * *

"What are your thoughts about a bonfire?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Finn just texted me. He's having a bonfire in his backyard. Come with me."

"Gale, I'm tired." God, she's so tired.

"It'll be fun. And I'll be there, if you're uncomfortable with anything, we'll come back home. I promise."

"Your mom-"

"Already taken care of. She approves. You can't keep yourself cooped up in this house Clove. It's not normal. And besides, you're starting to scare Posy."

"What?"

"Posy." Gale repeats quietly, "she's starting to think there's something wrong with you."

"There_ is_ something wrong with me, Gale."

"There's _nothing_ wrong with you." He says fiercely and protectively. "You're mourning, we're all mourning…just, come with me. Please."

"Fine." Gale has always managed to get Clove to agree to anything. She figured that out when she realized family is her weakness.

* * *

Gale wasn't exaggerating when he said that she'd cooped herself in the house for the past _month_. She sometimes doesn't move from her bed. Sometimes doesn't move from the couch. Or that one spot in the kitchen. She doesn't talk to anyone other than her cousins and aunt. She doesn't converse with neighbors. She's stopped answering text messages from the few friends from back home, who've tried keeping in touch with her.

She's become tired. Drained. The littlest things make her cry. _Lilo & Stitch_ made her weep on Wednesday. She sobbed so much she started to hyperventilate and maybe that's the reason why Posy is terrified of her. Why Gale looks so helpless, why Rory and Vick walk on eggshells around her, why aunt Hazelle holds her and runs her fingers through her hair and just lets her cry.

It's been almost two months and the pain in her heart; the hole in her life has not lessened any. In fact, it almost seems worse. As if everything is now magnified.

She hears the laughter before she sees anything. She can see Gale smile and she feels bad. She feels responsible that he spends most of his free time making sure she doesn't do anything stupid. That he has to spend it pulling her out of the dark when all she wants to do is sink in. She follows Gale as he walks behind the house and down a flight of wooden stairs.

It's a full moon and it illuminates their every step, guiding them to the group of teenagers toasting the dying days of summer.

She's going to go to school with these people. She's going to be in the same classes with these people. So, she might as well play polite. Or civil at least.

She can see Finnick with his arms wrapped around a stunning brunette. She's laughing at something he says and slaps Katniss' knee. Oh, _Katniss_. She almost forgot about her. _Almost_. She doesn't feel much for the girl, just indifference…and okay, maybe a little anger buts that's mostly for Gale. She looks at her cousin whose smile falters, just a little when he sees Katniss and Peeta, looking at each other lovingly and holding each other as if they're the only ones in the world. He looks at her and shrugs, as if saying, _there's_ _nothing I can do_. _The damage is already done._

There are other people she doesn't recognize. Other people who she doesn't know. Gale leads her further onto the sand and drops down next to Finnick. "You started without me. I'm hurt."

"You should be." Finnick responds. "I barely see you outside of practice. What the fuck man? Summer's basically done and we haven't done half the shit we planned to do."

"Had other things to do. My life doesn't revolve around you_ Romeo_." Gale laughs. Clove can tell it's forced and she frowns and wonders what else she's keeping him from accomplishing.

"That hurts_ Juliet_. It really fucking hurts."

"Should we leave you two alone?" The brunette next to Finnick asks laughingly. Clove can tell she laughs often and smiles just as much, but there is something behind her eyes, something dark, something lost, something that Clove knows all too well. She lets herself think wildly for a moment, _we could be friends_.

"You don't mind?" Gale teases. He gets up and grabs a beer from the cooler, "Clove, water?" He doesn't wait for her reply but instead passes her a cold water bottle. "Drink." He says quietly. He does this often. Tells her to eat and drink. She thinks she should be angry, should feel humiliated but with Gale…she never could stay angry with him. She always understood that he said and did everything out of love.

So, she uncaps the top and takes a gulp.

"Ah!" Finnick exclaims, "the elusive cousin. Clover?"

"_Clove_." She corrects automatically.

"I'm Annie." The brunette smiles, she moves from her spot next to Finnick to take the empty seat next to Clove. "It's nice to finally meet you. Gale only says awesome things about you. Have you met everyone? I'll introduce you," she points to Finn, "you've already met the bonehead over there," she lets out a small grin, "you've already met Katniss-oh come on Katniss, you have to admit, it's kind of funny-that's Peeta, her boyfriend. The blonde sucking face with Marvel is Glimmer, then there's Marvel, the brunette with the spiky hair and the disgusted look on her face is Johanna-call her Jo-and Cato."

Clove smiles tightly and tilts her bottle in acknowledgement.

"Manhattan, right?" The girl, Jo, calls out.

Clove nods. "Yeah."

"Isn't it usually Gale who goes down for the summer?" She questions.

"Typically. I come up for Christmas."

"So, when are you going back to Manhattan?" Peeta asks. He winces when Katniss elbows him. "What? I just asked a question."

"She's finishing school here." Gale answers for her, when she falters.

"Why?" Cato asks, looking at her with blue eyes.

_Why?_ She wants to laugh. Wants to hurl something at someone, _because my family is dead. Because I'm an orphan_. "Change of scenery." She says.

"So, senior year." Gale changes the subject quickly, "It's going to be epic."

"Finally!" Finn exclaims, "do you have any idea how fucking long I've waited to be a senior? Not to mention just one more year of dealing with Coin. I swear to God that woman has it out for me."

It's different being the outsider. Usually people don't know what to say, so they don't say anything. Clove is okay with that. She's okay with being the observer. For instance, she's probably the only one that sees Glimmer (when she finally comes up for air) glance at Cato. She's probably the only one who sees Jo look at Gale and then Katniss and Peeta, trying to asses the situation or even if there is one. She's probably the only one who sees Finn sometimes stare worriedly at Annie when she laughs a little too loud and a little too long. She's probably the only one who sees how desperate Katniss is to make eye contact with Gale and how Gale is doing his best to look at everyone but Katniss. She's probably the only one that notices Cato's gaze on her, studying her. (She has a distinct feeling that he's much more observant than he makes himself out to be).

Which unnerves and for some reason makes her heart flutter.

"Where's the bathroom?" She asks Gale.

"I'll show you." Cato says, "I gotta make a call anyways."

She nods reluctantly and follows the tall blonde inside.

* * *

"You and Gale are pretty close, huh?" Cato asks her as they make their way up the wooden stairs and to the house.

Clove nods as she follows him inside the house. "He's my cousin. Of course we're close. Known him my entire life."

"Us too." He turns his head and glances at her, "which is why we were so surprised when he suddenly stopped texting us when he left to see you."

There is a protectiveness that roars through her body, she hardens her gaze at the tall blonde, "what's that supposed to mean?"

"What_ really_ happened in Manhattan?"

"None of your business." Clove snaps. She sees an open door and recognizes the telltale signs of a sink and bolts for it. She slams the door with more force than necessary and locks it.

She leans against the sink and takes in a few deep breaths. _It's none of their business_, she tells herself. _It's no one's business_. She knew, just _knew_, that he was more perceptive than anyone thought. He's like her in that way, studies his surroundings, studies people's tells in order to see what they're hiding. She shakes her head and tries to clear her jumbled mind. She doesn't want to be here anymore. She doesn't want to be in this house, with these people she doesn't know, she doesn't want to be in this town, she wants to stop being a burden to her aunt and cousins…she just wants everything to stop.

She wishes she could press the _rewind_ so badly. She wants to erase the last two months and she would give her soul, just to see her parents one last time. To remember them how they used to be and not the lifeless image of them that keeps replaying in her mind.

She sighs and grips the sink tighter. She looks in the mirror and tilts her head to the left.

She barely recognizes the person staring back at her.

* * *

After she's done in the bathroom, she unlocks the door and walks out, only to stumble into a body. She loses her footing and grabs onto the persons arms to hold herself steady. She looks up into bright blue eyes and she groans inwardly. He smiles widely, his pearly white teeth gleaming like a wolf. "Well, I knew you were attracted to me, but I thought you'd play hard to get."

"Get over yourself." Clove mumbles and pushes against Cato. She rounds the corner and immediately presses herself back against the wall. She puts her arm out and stops Cato from moving any closer. "Stop."

"If you want to me-"

"God," she growls softly, "do you ever just _shut-up_?"

"You've been ignoring me for the past two months!" A voice snaps through the air. There is a hint of desperation and pleading in Katniss' voice that almost makes Clove feel sorry for her._ Almost_.

Cato, for his part, does manage to shut-up and slinks against the wall, next to Clove.

"I've been busy." Gale answers. Clove can tell by the sound of his voice that he's looking for a way out, an escape route away from Katniss.

"Too busy for _me_? I'm your best friend Gale. I didn't hear from you for two months. Your mother wouldn't tell me anything, Rory wouldn't tell me anything, Vick doesn't even talk to me and Posy obviously doesn't know anything. I was out of my mind with worry."

"Well," Gale bit out, "I'm sure _Peeta _helped you with that, didn't he?" Clove and Cato wince.

"Is this what this is about? Because I'm _dating Peeta_? You think I don't care for you?"

"You _don't_!" Gale snaps, his voice growing louder. "Because if you did, you'd know that I-" he stops himself from going any farther.

"You _what_?" Katniss pushes.

Clove wants to stop this before it goes any farther than it should. She knows that if he says the words, he won't be able to take them back. Cato is looking at her, as if silently asking her what they should do. Clove takes a deep breath, pushes herself off the wall. "Gale." She says, "can we go home now?"

Katniss whirls her head around and pinches the bridge of her nose. "We're in the middle of a conversation, so if you could please give us a minute."

"We're done talking Katniss." Gale says, his voice weary and heavy.

Katniss reels back as if slapped. "_Katniss_?" She repeats her own name as if it's foreign to her, "what happened to _Catnip_?"

"Well, to be honest," Cato says, looking between Gale and Katniss, "you've always hated that nickname."

"What happened to _Catnip _Gale?" Katniss asks, her voice is deceptively strong but it's her eyes that are the dead giveaway. Tears cloud over, pooling but never falling and Clove admires her for the strength she displays.

He heaves a sigh, "I don't know. Let me know when you find her."

She blinks, "you've changed. I don't know why or how but you've changed. You're not the Gale I used to know."

"Yeah, and you're not my Catnip. Where's your _spark_? Where's the fierceness? Where's the_ life_? Does _Peeta_ even know the _real_ you? Does he know what you like and what you don't like? Does he know that you fucking _hate_ public displays of affection but every time I see you two all you're doing is holding hands and kissing and he's always got his hand on you like he _possesses_ you."

"Gale." Clove says, "Gale, you need to stop."

"You know nothing about my relationship." Katniss snarls.

"Watch your tone." Clove snaps at her.

"Gale, man." Cato starts and then falters, "we're all friends okay? We're all friends."

"We don't know _her_!" Katniss points the finger at Clove. "How are we _all _friends, Cato? Huh? Ever since she came, nothing's been the same. Everyone knows is but no one says anything because of _you _Gale."

"Watch it, _Katniss_." Gale warns.

"Uh…did we miss something?" Finnick asks as the rest of the friends slip into the house.

"None of us and I mean _none of us_ were friends with_ Peeta_ but you, _you,_ brought him into our group. Clove is my _cousin_. She's my _family_. She's my _blood_."

"Let's all calm down." Peeta says, getting in the middle of them.

Gale rolls his eyes and pushes his arm away from him, "fuck off _Lover Boy_, this is between me and Katniss."

"Gale." Clove says quietly, putting a hand on his arm, trying her best to calm him down. "Let's just go home." She doesn't let the words Katniss say bother her, partly because she acknowledges that it's t_rue_ and partly because Clove just doesn't give a _fuck_.

"I don't even know you anymore!" Katniss cries out. "You're angry at me for dating Peeta but I've called you _every single day_ for two months. I've sent text messages, _every single day_ for two months and _you're_ the one who hasn't responded. _You're_ the one who's been ignoring me. You're the one who left us, _me_. _You left me behind_."

"Because you left me first!" Gale roars. "I've _loved you my entire life_ but _you left me first_. You say I've changed? _Me_? You've been drifting away from me _every day_ since last semester and I tried holding on, I tried being your best friend and then_ bam_, one day, you've got this boyfriend and suddenly _I_ don't know _you_ anymore."

There is silence, absolute silence. Clove looks around the room for a brief second and she knows, just knows that something has irrevocably changed in this room with this group of friends. Then all of a sudden, Annie, beautiful and obviously unhinged Annie, starts laughing. Hysterically.

"Gale." Clove says, "let's go home."

She pulls on his hand and he leaves willingly, she turns her head one last time to see Annie still laughing, Finnick trying desperately to calm her, Cato staring at her and Gale, Jo leaning against the sink, Glimmer staring at Cato, Marvel sighing, Peeta staring at Katniss, and Katniss staring at Gale's retreating back.

She doesn't know Katniss well, doesn't particularly _like_ the girl much, but she knows the look in her eyes. The dejected, desperate and lost look that screams _come back, don't leave me, please come back._

* * *

Clove is driving the truck back home. It's a small enough town and Clove is smart enough to memorize the route Gale took on the way to the bonfire. "How much did you have to drink?" Clove asks him as soon as she pulls out of the driveway and starts driving.

"One beer. I don't even have a buzz. Do you know where you're going?"

"Yes, I memorized the route you took, so I'm following it and don't change the subject. You're sober. You knew perfectly what you were saying…why did you say it?"

"Because I was angry. Because Peeta is always all over her and she obviously is uncomfortable with it, so why can't she see that? Why can't she see that he's making her into something she doesn't want to be? Why can't she see that she's the one changing too?"

"Why can't she see that you're the better option?" Clove supplies.

"I've fucked it all up, haven't I?"

"Probably." Clove responds, "but I mean, it's high school, life is supposed to be fucked up. Friends fight all the time and you and Katniss, you'll get over it. Besides, I think she loves you too."

"Fuck off Clove." He groans.

"I'm being serious." She takes a glance at him and then turns her attention back to the road. "Gale, you didn't see her when we left. She's _heartbroken_. She doesn't know what to do. Probably doesn't even know what to think. You're her best friend. You're the one who she's been turning to for the past how many ever years. She _loves_ you. And I don't think she even knows it."

"I hate him."

Clove nods in understanding. She doesn't have to ask whom, she already knows. "He is a bit on the scrawny side. You could totally take him in a fight." She lets out a grin.

Gale laughs and leans his head against the window. "You ever feel…trapped? Like you're completely screwed no matter what you do? That your life isn't even really your life and you have no say in what happens?"

"All the time, Gale. All the time."

They don't say anything else the entire ride back to the house. Clove finds that they've said all they really needed to say anyways.

* * *

_So, this story is not behaving, is it? I needed to get these chapters out of the way but the next one is going to be in school and trust me, it definitely has more Cato in it. I PROMISE. I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter! I want to give a __**HUGE THANKS TO MY REVIEWERS**__: __**clovelycato555, Anon, Guest, Guest, catoandclove4eva, an incandescence, CatoxClove, GottaLoveClove**__ and also, a __**HUGE AND SUPER SPECIAL SHOUTOUT TO:**__** Allison**__, your review made me cry, seriously. _

_You guys make me feel so awesome, you have no idea how much your support means to me in this. Each one of you help me write this story and I strive for it to be one that you guys will remember! Thanks again for the support! And thanks to everyone who's reading/favoriting/alerting, you guys are awesome!_

_If I missed anyone, I apologize!_

_Much love, _

_**Bex. **_

_**P.S**__. Any mistakes are mine and mine alone. I apologize if they offend anyone. _


	4. Chapter 4

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing. If I did, student loans would not be an issue and I would be able to travel the world. Alas, student loans is an issue and the world has yet been mine for the taking. _

_**Pairing**__: Cato/Clove, Gale/Katniss/Peeta, Marvel/Glimmer, Finnick/Annie, others mentioned and alluded to. _

_**Summary:**__ AU. After a horrific accident, Clove McAllister is sent to live with her cousin Gale in the small town of Panem. Life, love, trust and tragedy come full force as a group of friends are confronted with falling apart of coming together._

_**Author's note**__: AU. So, no Hunger Games. Panem is a fictional town outside of Connecticut (which obviously doesn't exist, but humor me, please). Wherein Cato is nosy, Effie and Haymitch make an appearance and Clove rears the ugly side of her beautiful face. _

* * *

_This bittersweet tragedy_

_Chapter 4_

* * *

Panem High is nowhere near as big as her old school but she somehow still manages to get lost. She's parted ways with Gale at this point, her feet trying to lead her to Calculus and his leading him to Physics. There is the constant hustle and bustle that always come with the first day of classes, sometimes Clove is practically thrown against the lockers, sometimes she's pushed out of the way but most of the time, she's ignored.

And that's fine with her. Because by now, the entire school knows she's new in town and that she's somehow the reason why best friends Gale and Katniss are not speaking to each other. Gale was infuriated when that one rumor reached his ears but Clove calmed him down, told him to remember their endgame. _We're going to get the fuck out of here and never come back_, she reminded him as gently as she could.

Even though she feels alone, she knows she's not. Gale always seems to pop up during class change and Marvel and Jo are in her World History class. She sees Katniss in the hallway, leaning against the lockers, Peeta standing next to her, whispering softly in her ear and Clove can feel her blood boil. Clenching the paper in her hand tightly, she makes a beeline to the door at the end of the hall. She steps into the class, as soon as the bell rings and she takes the empty seat in the second row.

The woman at the front of the class is authoritative in her own right. Tall, brown eyes and even darker hair; she stands straight and stares at the students with intense eyes. "Enough with the chit-chat." She says, her voice cutting through the air. The conversations end as soon as she speaks. "I take it everyone enjoyed their summer and if you didn't, I don't particularly care." Her eyes cut to the door as it creaks open. "How nice of you to join us, Mr. Lovett."

"Ah, come on, Paylor. You know I need to make an entrance."

"It's _Ms._ Paylor and anything less, I'll have you suspended. And yes, I can do that. Now, take a seat next to the new girl."

_Please don't let it be him_, Clove chants internally. _Please, God, don't let it be him_. God doesn't seem to be listening to her, because all she sees is a burly pale, blonde haired, blue-eyed boy sit beside her. "Hey Clovey." He says with a smirk.

"I hope you're all comfortable with where you're sitting, because the person sitting next to you is going to be you're partner for any and all assignments we're going to have in this class."

She doesn't know whether to scream or slap the smirk off of Cato's face.

* * *

"Haven't seen you in a while." Cato comments as he hands her the assigned worksheets. "Not since the bonfire."

_Oh, you mean when everything blew to shit and your little group of friends, somehow disintegrated into nothing? That bonfire?_ "I've been spending time with my cousins."

"Gale isn't speaking to Katniss." Cato says after a lapse of silent.

"Well, it's not like Katniss is speaking to him either."

"I don't think you understand how serious this is. Katniss and Gale…they're best friends, before any of us, it was them."

Clove frowns and she turns around in her seat, "what does this have to do with me? My cousin is a grown guy who can obviously take care of himself and Katniss is being a petulant little shit. You can defend her all you want but even you know that dating Peeta is low. She'd have to be blind_ and_ stupid to not see that Gale's been in love with her since _forever_."

He shakes his head and his eyes are lit with merriment. "Anyone ever tell you you're really kind of beautiful when you're angry?"

She ignores the flutter in her heart and focuses on her anger. "You're tricks aren't going to work on me. You want Katniss and Gale to kiss and make-up, do it on your own. I want nothing to do with it."

Cato hums, "and why is that? Your cousin just lost his best friend and you're not trying to patch things up. That seems, backwards, doesn't it?"

_It is backwards_, Clove will admit to that, but Gale has been her rock. Gale has been her _everything_ since the accident and she doesn't want to lose that. She doesn't want to be left alone in a new town, in a new school with people who don't know her and as of this moment, probably don't even like her. She doesn't want to be left alone with her nightmares of being the only survivor of her family. So, she hasn't tried to patch things up between Katniss and Gale because it really is _none_ of her business and for once, she just wants to have the knowledge that Gale will always be by her side. "What are you trying to say?"

"They've gotten into fights before." Cato says, ignoring her question, "and I mean fights. But they always manage to make up within the day. But this…this one is epic. And it's been a couple weeks, which leaves us all on edge and makes us wonder, I mean it is curious, Gale's attachment and commitment to you. He snaps at anyone who insults you, he's protective of you and the only person outside of his _immediate _family that he protects is Katniss." He leans back in his chair, "I'm not saying anything. I'm _asking_. What happened in Manhattan that made Gale change and made you move?"

"None of your business."

"Lovett, New Girl." Ms, Paylor snaps, "stop flirting and do your work."

Clove counts to ten to ensure that her heartbeat goes back to normal.

* * *

After Calculus she has a free period, so she makes a beeline for the library. It's not a large library, but it's big enough to hide her and that's all that Clove cares about. There's hardly anyone in the library, most students in their classes or on an extended lunch break.

She makes her way to the back of the library and plops down on one of the chairs, head on her arms. She doesn't want to be here. Doesn't want to be in this town. In this school. Doesn't want to feel so alone. She's known as the new girl to students and teachers. No one cares about her. Not that she can blame them. She hasn't exactly been the nicest person.

But Cato…that damn boy manages to get under her skin and he always, _always_ asks about Manhattan. Always asks about what happened, as if he knows there's something more going on with her than just a _change of scenery._ As if he knows she's volatile, one misstep and she's on the dissent into a darkness that she knows _no one_ will be able to pull her out of.

She lets out a small sigh and frowns when she hears high pitched talking. "No! Darius, he obviously meant no harm. He's just…well, yes I understand that…I'm at work…is he hurt?...he did _what_? Oh, that insufferable inebriate fool…no, I understand. Right after work, I promise to pick him up…thank you ever so much, Darius."

Clove bends forward and sees a tall women in stiletto heels, a pink skirt and white shirt. Her blonde hair is loose. She's an older woman in her late twenties or early thirties and obviously, according to her nametag, the librarian. The woman lets out a small shriek as soon as she sees Clove. "Oh! Hello, dear, I didn't see you there."

"Drunken trouble?" Clove asks conversationally.

The woman sighs, "I suppose you can say that. He's sleeping it off in the drunk tank. I swear, he sleeps there more than in his own bed."

"So, then why put up with him?" Clove asks, as if it's the most obviously thing in the world. Not that she should even be asking. It's_ so_ obviously _none of her business_ but there's something about this women, this tall blonde haired blue eyed woman that seems sad and lonely and trying to cover it up as much as she can. And Clove…well, Clove finds that she can relate.

The woman lets out a sad sigh and her entire demeanor changes, "it's a very long and complicated story that I wouldn't wish on anyone." Then she brightens up and claps her hand, "oh! How silly of me to forget my manners, my name is Ms. Effie Trinket, Librarian. Is there anything I can help you with my dear?"

Clove shakes her head, "Just…catching my bearings."

Effie nods, "Of course! It's such a big big big day for you isn't it?"

Clove manages a small smile for the woman. "Sure. I guess it is."

* * *

"Clove." Annie breathes as she makes her way through the library. "There you are, I've been looking everywhere for you."

Clove frowns and looks away from her textbook and notes. "What for?" She likes Annie. There's something about the brunette that is…different.

"It's lunch and I want you to sit with us."

Clove lets out a little laugh and shakes her head. "Yeah, no. That's not going to happen."

Annie frowns, "well, why not? We're all going to be there."

Clove sighs and pushes her chair away from the desk. "Look, Annie, I like you. You seem really cool and maybe, one day, I will sit with you guys at lunch but right now…I just…it's a little overwhelming."

The brunette is silent for a few moments, rocking back and forth on the heels of her feet. "You know, you don't have to go through this alone. I can tell that…you're sad and I just…it's better to have a support system. So, when you're ready, we'll be here. We'll_ all_ be here, because that's what we do."

Clove nods slowly. "Thanks Annie." Then she turns around and goes back to studying.

Annie leaves a few seconds after that and Clove is left listening to the clock as it ticks time away.

* * *

She manages to get through the rest of her day (AP English Literature and Chemistry with Gale) with little to no trouble. She's in Katniss' AP English class and thankfully, the teacher is all about alphabetical order, so she and Katniss are on opposite sides of the room. Not that it really matters because Katniss Everdeen is the last thing that Clove cares about.

Gale has practice after school, so she tells him that she'll wait around. _It's nice out,_ she says, _I'll do my homework outside_. Except, it turns out the rest of his friends think so too. So, Clove spots Jo, Annie and Katniss sitting on the bleachers and watching the boys play football.

She doesn't want to deal with Katniss. Doesn't really want to deal with any of them so, she makes her way onto the field, clutching the straps of her backpack and finds Gale through the mesh of sweaty teenage boys. "I'll meet you at home." She tells Gale.

Gale turns around from his conversation with Finnick and Cato and frowns. "You don't know the way."

"Yeah," Finnick smirks, "we wouldn't want you to get lost."

Clove rolls her eyes, "this town is a _square_. If I somehow managed _all_ of _New York_, I think I can handle _Panem_."

"Are you sure?" Gale asks worriedly.

"Positive."

"We still on for tomorrow?" Cato calls out loudly.

Clove grasps her straps harder_. Right,_ she forgot that she was going to meet him at lunch to go over Calculus. _Fantastic_. And now, the rest of the school knows it too. He's wearing a small smirk, as if knowing how uncomfortable it is. "Sure."

"It's a date then." He challenges.

Clove bristles. "It definitely isn't but hey, whatever makes sense in your deluded mind. See you at home Gale."

"What the _fuck_ is going on with you and my _cousin_?" Gale snaps as he turns around to Cato.

* * *

So, even though Panem is literally a square, Clove manages to get lost. Or maybe she just doesn't want to go back to the house. Or maybe…yeah, no, she's _lost_. It's not that she meant to get lost; it's just that, it happened. Naturally of course.

She hears huffing and a shrill familiar voice and a male voice bellowing. She frowns and turns around to see Ms. Effie Trinket, the school librarian struggling to carry a man nearly twice her size. He's not making it any easier for the librarian.

"This is your fault."

"How is this my fault? Did I shove whiskey down your throat at the break of dawn you insufferable oaf?"

"I hate you."

"Well, you're no picnic either." She snaps.

"Ms. Trinket?" Clove asks, "Do you need some help?"

The man squints at the new voice, "who's the midget?"

"Oh. My. God. Your lack of manners is appalling!" She smiles brightly at Clove. "No dear, it's alright, I've got this. Run along and have fun."

Right. _Have fun_. She would, if she knew where the fuck she was going.

* * *

In the end, it's Vick who finds her. She's long since, given up trying to find her way back to the house, so she camps out at the gazebo, where she takes up the bench with her homework and buries her head in analyzing poems for English.

"Jesus, Clove!" Vick yells, "we've been looking _everywhere_ for you!"

"Oddly," Clove muses, "that's the second time someone's said that to me today."

Vick rolls his eyes. "Gale came home without you and mom asked where you were and Gale was like _'she came home earlier'_ and then mom was like _'um…no. No. She didn't._' Gale went so pale and now we've split up looking for you. I'm going to call them and let them know. You couldn't have called us?"

"Phone died during school." She explains. "I didn't mean to worry anyone."

"Yeah, yeah. Can't wait until mom gets her hands on you. She's going to wring your neck. Not to mention Gale. He'll probably kill you."

* * *

Her aunt Hazelle takes one look at her, bursts into tears, hugs her and then promptly grounds her.

Gale however looks at her with amusement, worry and a little bit of anger. "A _square _huh?"

"Octagon?" Clove supplies.

* * *

Despite her prior wishes, Clove gets involved with the entire Katniss and Gale drama. She wasn't planning on it, but she sees him staring at old photos on his phone when they're sitting on the couch and it saddens her to see how sad he is, so she sighs and asks, "how come you haven't made up with Katniss yet?"

"Because she doesn't want to." Is his reply.

"Do you know that?" She presses.

"Why would she when she has Peeta?" The bitterness is definitely there.

"Because you're Gale and she's Katniss or your Catnip, or _whatever_."

There's silence before he lets out a huge sigh, "I told her I loved her. I mean, I actually told her and she hasn't said anything, hasn't texted anything, hasn't _done_ anything. If that's not rejection, I don't know what is."

"She's confused." Clove rationalizes, even though it physically pains her to defend Katniss. "She thinks she's supposed to be with Peeta probably because you never made your move and then she loses you. Loses the only steady thing in her life, probably and she freaks. Gale…talk to her."

"And say what? _'hey, sorry, I blurted out I love you, let bygones be bygones even though I really fucking hate your boyfriend? Oh and by the way, yeah, I still love you.' _Yeah, Clove, I'm sure that'll go over great."

"Gale." She says sharply. "Get your head out of your ass. She is right _here_. She is right in _front of you_. She goes to school with you. She has the same friends as you. You're wasting your time with this petty argument. Okay, I get it, she took out your heart and stomped on it but she's been your best friend since you were kids and she's _alive_. Nobody has forever Gale. Would you rather her in your life as you best friend or not in your life at all?"

"Can't I have her as a best friend and a girlfriend?"

"Maybe someday but it's obviously not going to be today, or like, _anytime_ in the near future."

"I'm not apologizing for telling her I love her."

"Never asked you to."

He blows a raspberry and nudges her thigh with his foot. "You doing okay?"

She lapses into silence, _is she doing okay? What, is he joking?_ "No." She answers him truthfully. "I'm not."

"What's going on between you and Cato?"

She groans and puts a pillow over her face. "Nothing!"

* * *

A week passes and Clove is still not doing okay. More than once a day, she has to count to ten to try and control her breathing, her thoughts, her emotions. She's waiting for the day that things get somewhat easier, still helplessly waits and hopes that maybe, just maybe, time really is all she needs. Then she remembers her aunt Hazelle and realizes that the older woman is right. Time healing all wounds is a crock of shit.

She manages to control her hysteria around Posy though. Trying her best to smile and when she feels like sobbing, she goes all the way downstairs to the living room and smothers her cries in a pillow.

Nights hurt the most. Because all she can remember is creeping down the stairs in her old home and curling on her favorite couch with her favorite blanket and watching old black and white movies. All she can remember is waking up to the smell of coffee and her mother sitting at the kitchen table smiling warily at her. At least during the day she has school (and oddly Effie) to keep her distracted but everything comes rearing its ugly head at night when shadows of who she used to be creep up on her.

Katniss and Gale made up. He told Clove late one night that he texted her and early the morning, Clove wakes up to the sound of muffled voices. She can make out Katniss and Gale's voices and since she doesn't hear any screams, she figures that they're okay. That everything will somehow work itself out between the two of them.

Clove doesn't sit with them at lunch. Instead, she makes her way to the library and buries herself in her schoolwork. Sometimes, Cato meets her there to work on Calculus. He'll flirt, she'll steady her heartbeat and nonchalantly reject him.

Today is one of those days that he's in the library with her. They're working on an assignment that she wants to get done because she still has the Crusades to cover for History and more poems to analyze for English, not to mention her Chemistry homework that taunts her from her backpack. Oh, and it's Friday, so she would rather _not_ have Calculus to do over the weekend.

They're done in record timing, even have five minutes to spare before the warning bell goes off. She lets out a sigh and looks at the boy across from her. She didn't notice it before because she was so engrossed in her work but he hasn't really said much that isn't Calculus related. Which she should feel happy about but for some reason, it makes her uneasy. He hasn't flirted with her, hasn't tried his usual tricks that almost seem routine now and for some reason he can't even look her in the eyes.

She leans back in her chair and levels him with a stare. "What is it? You haven't been…acting like yourself."

He fiddles with the pencil in his hands, twirling it around his fingers; her eyes follow it, growing slightly dizzy. "I was talking to a friend last night…he told me some things."

"Are you okay? Is…your family okay?" She won't deny that she's slightly worried for him. He annoys her half the time, infuriates her the other half but makes her heart beat so damn fast _most_ of the time that she can't help feeling worried.

"It's not about me, but thanks for your concern." He manages a small smile and lifts his head to look at her. "I talked to Thresh."

_Thresh_. The name alone almost makes her burst into tears. _Thresh_. The tall, intimidating boy that she's competed against everything for. She always used to partner up with him back home in any class they were in with each other. They competed with grades, extra-curricular activities, student council and favoritism from their classmates and teachers (she nearly always won that because she's so much more talkative than he is). _Thresh_. Her first kiss. Her first…well…everything. He's a scholarship student that always kept her on her toes and since the accident she pulled away from him, refused to answer his calls, texts, e-mails (and okay, so maybe her and Gale share more than blood, they also have a tendency to push people away).

"How do you even know Thresh?" She asks, her voice devoid of any emotion.

He spins some story about camp when they were younger and how they kept in touch since then and she can't help but feel like she's heard this story before, but definitely the short and to-the-point version from Thresh. Cato lets out a breath and looks at her again. This time Clove can see the sadness and pity in his blue eyes. "Clove…I didn't know…I'm-"

"Save it." She hisses, she can feel the anger and frustration coursing through her body. Her mind is a jumbled mess and she's overcome with the sudden vicious feeling that she wants to _stab something_. "You had no right. You have no right."

"Why didn't you just tell me?" He asks. "We're friends."

"It's none of your business and what the _fuck_ is up with you_ people_? _We're not friends_. I'm no one's friend."

"Clove?" Effie asks hesitantly as she peers over at them, her eyes are wide with concern, "are you alright dear?"

"Fine." She says through grinding teeth. She puts a hand up when Cato opens his mouth. "_Shut-up_. I don't want your excuses. I don't want your meaningless apologies. You want to know why I didn't tell you? _Any_ of you? _First_, it's none of your fucking business,_ second_, I don't _know_ you and_ third_ it's_ none of your fucking business_. I'm leaving. Tell Gale I'm leaving and that if he knows what's good for himself and humanity, _no one_ will come after me."

She stomps her way out of the library and pushes past an oblivious Glimmer, a confused and worried Annie and a disinterested Jo.

She wants to cry. Wants to scream. But most of all, she just really wants to die.

* * *

She sends a text to Vick telling him that she's fine and she'll be home later but no one try to look for her. She still needs to calm down. Still needs to get a hold of herself and her emotions. Counting to ten doesn't work anymore. Nothing seems to work anymore.

She's humiliated. She didn't want anyone to know. Didn't want to be known as the orphan girl. She doesn't want anyone's pity and she's pretty sure that's what ticked her off at the library. She could see the pity in Cato's eyes and she hated it.

She folds her legs under her and looks at the setting sky from her spot in the gazebo.

"Haymitch, come back. Watch out! Oh, you fool, let me help." She hears Effie and it's almost like clockwork with Effie and Haymitch, a man she's never met and at this point doesn't really want to.

"Leave me alone, woman. This is your fault. Everything is your fault!" He slurs his words but even Clove can hear the venom behind them.

"Haymitch."

"You're pathetic. You know why she was ever friends with you? Because she felt _sorry_ for you. And you killed her. Murderer. _Murderer_!"

Clove whips her head around and sees Effie rooted to the spot. She's grown sickly pale and her hand is covering her mouth.

"I've got this Trinket." An older man with one hand appears next to Effie. He looks to be tipsy but nowhere near as intoxicated as Haymitch. "Just…relax or something. He doesn't mean half the shit he says. He's drunk as a skunk."

"Skunks can't get drunk." Effie says, her voice cracking but her eyes never leave Haymitch who has quieted down and is looking everywhere but at Effie. She turns her head and looks at the older man and nods. "Thank you very much."

The two leave and Clove watches as Effie stumbles her way to the gazebo. She looks startled to see Clove there and then she bows her head, as if shamed. "Are you…everything okay, Effie?" Clove asks hesitantly.

Effie nods and tries to smile. "Of course it is dear. You know what they say…_sticks and stones_."

Effie Trinket breaks Clove's heart. From the first day of school, Clove has liked the librarian. She's eccentric and hardly ever stops talking sure, but she doesn't bother Clove, always manages to make her chuckle as she reprimands students on their manners of all things and has Vice Principle Heavensbee wrapped around her pinky finger. The fact that there's always a chocolate treat on her desk in the library desk at lunch is always a plus too.

Clove moves to make more room for Effie at the other end of the bench and she sighs. She looks at Effie whose body is still trembling and for one moment, Clove is transported back in time. (She's sitting in the ambulance, a blanket around her shoulders, trembling like a leaf as she watches both her parents wheeled away on a stretcher, white sheets covering their bodies).

"My parents are dead." Clove tells her quietly. "It was a car accident coming back from my soccer game. I was in the back."

"My best friend-Maysilee Donner-was driving. She was Haymitch's girlfriend and we were in Manhattan. I had just gotten promoted at the New York Public Library. She came up to celebrate and she died. Haymitch has never forgiven me. It all happened so _fast_. One minute we were laughing, the next minute she's dead and I'm barely breathing." She blinks away the tears but some slip out. "Sometimes, I still feel like that. Like I'm barely breathing."

"You and I both, Effie. You and I both."

* * *

When she gets to the house that night, it's dark. She doesn't bother going to her room. No, instead, she goes straight for the sofa, grabs the remote, turns on the television and furiously flicks through the channels until she lands on the one she's looking for. There's an old black and white movie playing, she doesn't know the title, doesn't particularly care.

She does however, grab the pillow and put it over her face, smothering her tears and swallowing her cries.

Pity is an ugly emotion but grief is even worse.

* * *

_So…I've rewritten this chapter probably three times and settled on this one. Also, I would have had this up sooner, but I kind of got hooked oh Haymitch/Effie, which is obvious. I just…love them. Like I love Clato. _

_Also, so I'm Canadian. So, my dear American friends on fanfiction, if someone would be so kind to PM with information about homecoming (what is it exactly?) and Prom (is it before or after the graduation ceremony?) that would be greatly appreciated. Because, I don't want to get anything wrong in this and I've been reading up but it's different with everything I read. Also, does the first football game fall on Homecoming or not? It's a little bit different where I live…so, yeah. Any help is greatly appreciated. _

_**HUGE THANKS TO MY REVIEWERS!:**__**rochay97, clovelycato555, Lex, Clato 27, GottaLoveClove, Dovewoman951, CatoxClove, DCdreamer55**__ and __**Katrina Luvs You**__. If I missed anyone I apologize! Also, __**HUGE THANKS**__ to everyone to favorited/alerted, all that jazz, because without you, this wouldn't be possible!_

_**Last note**__: I know I shouldn't do, I really know I shouldn't but if anyone is an Hayffie fan, I'm going to have a story about them out either later tonight or later tomorrow night. It's going to be called _The Illuminated Ones_ It's going to be AU but still in Hunger Games verse. I won't say anymore than that, but Effie will be living in District 12 (you'll have to read to find out why!) Also, head's up, ages will be changed. Circumstances will be changed. Hearts will be broken. People unfortunately will die and may the odds be ever in your favor. (I'm done with the shameless pimping, hopefully). _

_That's it, that's all! I promise…for now. LOL. _

_Much love, _

_**Bex. **_

_**P.S**__. I apologize for any mistakes!_


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